Change

Change is good, right? Well, Nick is finally going into ministry. Back in the Spring, we began praying seriously about it and making a move and everything in preparation for it. And, finally, it is here! I couldn't be more happy for him! But, the disturbance in the calm that was within me has me troubled. Why can't I just go with the flow and not have it affect me so? And it's not like it's faith rattling turbulence, it's just a subtle enough of a difference in life that I feel the inner turmoil. May I ride this river with peace!! That is my desire.

The other change is Ashlyn entering 1st grade. What in the world? I've longed for this for so long and she has finally began the journey of full days away from the home and I must admit that it is different from what I expected. It's a mad rush out the door in the morning. And after surviving the whining and sibling rivalry of the other two all day, it's hard to have a smile to welcome her home where she begins her homework and then wants dinner and before you know it, it's bed time! All, I can say, is Labor Day Weekend should be fun at the lake with a ton of time together as a family!

Laptop Happy

As I sit at Panera Bread realizing that this is something that many people have done for a long time, I'm feeling official. It's funny how just a laptop and no distractions can take me to different places. Now that I have this mobile journal (i just came up with that name) I think I'll have to do away with the old paper and pen. Has that time of my life really come to an end? I think so. I had been writing in journals for the past 12 years and now this gives it a new uumph (a word I've loved for a long time!)
The question for me is what will be published? I love the look and layout of the blog page and my Word document doesn't offer the same thing. I'll have to decide if I abandon completely my idea of journalling for spiritual growth on a blog or just in a folder in my documents.

Cookie Breakfast

If I could eat my cookies in the morning, I wouldn't feel the guilt that I do at night. I'd have the whole day ahead of me to appreciate the taste and to burn off those calories. I really don't have much more to say about this.

My mornings have changed so much lately. Since the Passion conference and the purchase of this new bible of mine, I excitedly wake up to coffee that Nick brings to me in bed and time to discover more about our God in His Word. What a privilege it is to handle the Bible so freely and discuss it so openly. I've been perplexed as to why I question so much more each time I read a story in the Old Testament. I'm asking things about the text I never saw in the first place to ask. Maybe you can only be spoon fed for so long. I delight in the fact that I was raised on all the classic Bible stories. But as I have transitioned into the one that teaches it to her own children, I find myself learning so much more about God rather than the details of the story. I'm excited about this newness in my reading.

Valentine's Day

With hearts on the mind, a wonderful discussion happened in the car with my four year old daughter, Meg. She told me that she had invited Jesus into her heart and I asked her if she really knew what that meant and how to do it. After explaining to her that He took the punishment for our sins by dying on the cross, I asked her if she believed that He did that for her. I asked her if she wanted to pray with me to invite Him into her heart, She said that she wanted to invite him in but didn't want Him to live there. I can't imagine what a four year old must think in trying to comprehend that. I'm just excited that she has found Jesus to be someone she wants in her life.

What a blessing it is that we (Nick and I) are in a place spiritually to introduce to our children from the earliest time some of the greatest blessings of knowing HIM!

Today is also her Grammy's Birthday! What a neat memory for Meg to share her Spiritual Birthday with her Grammy!!!

Struggling with Puppy Love

Spencer is my dog. He is only 7 months old. We bought him as a puppy (12 weeks old.) I paid a whopping $150.00 for him. Then, all the money for the shots, the neutering (poor thing), the puppy training classes (and some of the babysitting we paid for to take him to the classes), the collar, the leash, the food, the dog treats, the dog toys for him to eat so that he won't eat our furniture and the girls' toys. You can probably hear already the regret I have in buying a puppy. So I begin to struggle on getting this dog to obey when I can't even get my children to obey. I can't get rid of the kids, so I contemplate getting rid of the dog?! Nick says he loves the dog and the girls do to. Do I love the dog? I just did a whole scrapbook layout in our family album for crying outloud!!!! How long do I have to hang in there for the dog to outgrow his chew on everytihng stage? I hope this stage passes quickly as this daily testing is getting old.

In My Head

I'm starting this space as a place to gather thoughts with the intention of growing in my relationship with the Lord. See, when I'm at the red light, I've stopped enough to actually pay attention to the Spirit living within me. I believe if we would all just hush ourselves enough and write down some of what He's teaching us, we'd all grow in amazing ways. I'll take what randomly (or Sovereignly) comes into my head and form a journal allowing growth to take place.

I've often times thought that I should write a book because of my life experiences and my gifts. See, I have the gift of transparency and honesty. I have bumps in my journey that I'm not afraid to talk about. I desire for God to be glorified in talking about them and for growth to take place in other people because of them. But, because of blogging, I no longer feel that I have to write a book. I can express thoughts and join in with others in discussion. It's like a live article. I'm so excited about the sense of community that happens here!

Introduce Yourself

1.WHO are you?
2.WHAT do you do? (like job)
3.WHEN did you start blogging?
4.WHERE are you from?
5.WHY are you here (in blog land?)
and
6.HOW OFTEN do you visit?

My answers:
1. Rachel. I am a mother that struggles on a daily basis to die to self.
2. I stay at home taking care of, disciplining, and training 3 girls.
3. In Feb. 2007 but not seriously or consistently until September of 07.
4. Oklahoma
5. To grow. To process. To learn.
6. Every couple of days.

Your turn to answer :)