Monday, November 23, 2009

Running debrief...

On my run yesterday I actually retained enough that I simply have to regurgitate some of it here.

"We care more about our comfort than our character" - Francis Chan

When using the word steadfast or endure, the definition requires the weight to hold to be steadfast or to endure in the strength. You are not enduring when it is removed. So when building endurance, you have to have the thing there that you have to endure. The discomfort. So many people want a comfortable pain-free life. Character isn't developed without struggle. So, I would want to choose the uncomfortable, painful things that make me stronger and better FOR God's glory. Grow me. Change me. Don't take it away and make it all better, because then I'm deprived of the opportunity to become who God wants me to become.

I actually prayed the strongest prayer I think I've ever prayed when listening to Francis' sermon yesterday. I'm posting it here to chronicle it. I said, "Whatever it takes!" I don't even want to type out the things I offered to God, but they were about as open handed as one could get. Then this morning, I got a little scared. Is this the last time I'll see my daughter? Are things so amazing with my husband right now, because this is the end? Regardless, my hand has no grip on anything in my life and I freely offer it all to God. As I write this, I realize He has always had the power to take and I just handed an invisible baton of control.

"Things are caught, not taught" -familiar quote requoted by Francis Chan

The best parenting advice EVER: Work on yourself first. If you are self-controlled and equipped in God's armor and filled with the Spirit and so on and so forth, your children will see and learn so much more than when you are throwing commands while suffering in your own internal battle.

For me, personally this translated into getting up in the mornings before my children. Around my house, I am blessed to have a husband that delights in doing the morning routine. This allows me to just sleep right through it all!!!! I LOVE sleep!!! But, for me, I felt like I was actually sinning by sleeping in every single morning. I was flirting with the depression that I am tempted by each day. During those morning hours I struggle with facing what my role is. Well, starting this morning, I set the alarm and obediently got out of bed to work on myself first! So far so good! I'm excited and challenged!

6 comments:

Nikkie said...

thank you : )

Mimi said...

This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope. The LORD'S lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassion never fail. They are new EVERY morning; great is Your faithfulness.
Lam 3:21-23

Chelle said...

You make my face smile.

Mari said...

Thank you! Amazing and convicting. They do learn more when I am "living it" and not 'barking it'.
Working on myself has not been priority lately..I really needed to read this!

Christy said...

wow, that is something that I have said so many times over... that I am going to actually get up before the kids and get myself ready... and still have yet to do it. I applaude you for doing it. I am still struggling, but I know, as you said, these discomfots are there for our growth and refining. So I too gladly say Lord anything...

shanna said...

like you, I need to be up in the mornings before the day starts. I have had sleep issues for awhile and so my morning times have been inconsistant...I can tell a big difference in my weeks. I love, love, love the point behind this post! May our whole lives be a series of joys and sorrows that draw us near! Miss you!