I guess I thought your "godliness" was ranked somehow by how clearly you hear God's Voice when you are in the middle of making a decision.
I'm usually not a "deleter" but I just wrote like a fourth of the story and it felt way too lengthy. It was all to say what I learned and that is that sometimes there isn't clarity even if you are seeking God's voice, will or heart. I think you can make a decision where there really isn't a right or wrong. It felt like we were in mirky water and couldn't see clearly through our circumstances to know if this was all spiritual warfare or God's way of telling us what to do.
This was something so difficult in the midst of such trying circumstances that I'm feeling very worn out.
All of this is wrapped around the fact that my Dad is back at the Heart Hospital. This time it is either pneumonia or Congestive Heart Failure. So, I'm headed up there now. That's one decision I know is right!