Thoughts

I think out many posts that I'd like to write. They are usually evaluating how I'm handling the things that I'm dealing with in my life. They obviously don't make it here. I used to be so good at that. Now, I get frustrated that they haven't made it here.

As I scurry around trying to pack four of us up for our trip to CO (yes, I make my husband at least pack his own bag), I had the desire to unload weeks worth of thoughts onto my blog. Of course now I sit looking at a blinking cursor begging me to begin. The problem is that I don't know where to begin and I'm quite scared to unload because I lack a filter that most people have. This blank page is dangerous territory for me.

Father, I take comfort in the fact that You know where I am and what this past week has been like for me. I beg for You to help me grab a hold of the Peace that you offer right here in the midst of my hardship. Before I hit the road, wash me in Your Presence.

That is simply all I can offer right now!!!!

Little Drummer Boy...

...at my church!!!!

My crying laugh!!!

I laughed so hard that tears came to my eyes. Before I knew it- it was a full sob that was all triggered from laughter. This is like the 2nd time in a month. It makes me wonder if my hormones are out of whack or something??? I love to laugh until I cry, but laugh into a sob? I'm just wondering if something is wrong with me. It felt good, nonetheless.
Here's one little picture for now :)

Twilight

As I read Twilight, I felt the strongest desire to be dazzled by something. By definition, I want to be "bewildered by spectacular display"!!!!

daz·zle (dzl)
v. daz·zled,
1. To dim the vision of, especially to blind with intense light.
2. To amaze, overwhelm, or bewilder with spectacular display: a figure skater who dazzled the audience with virtuosic jumps.
v.intr.
1. To become blinded.
2. To inspire admiration or wonder.

As I read this definition, I realize that I don't want to be blinded. Or do I? Am I longing for something so intense and powerful that it would leave it's mark? Still reading "Crazy Love" I am concluding that if we did truly know God and know Him well, we would be more dazzled.

God, take my desires to be dazzled and satisfy them with Yourself! Oh, how far I wonder when I glance away from you!

Birthday Wisdom

I was asked to write out something to a dear friend who is turning sixteen! Here is what the Lord gave to me:

Happy Birthday!

Life experience is where we learn most things. However, I once heard that we simply don’t have enough of our own bones to break in our body to learn everything we need to learn. So we can learn from other people’s broken bones. I’ll break my arm doing a cartwheel and tell you how not to do that. You can break your nose running into a wall and you can tell me about that experience. I think you get the idea, but just in case you don’t then let me try to be very specific.

If someone tells you not to do drugs, just ask them why. Maybe they have a broken bone story they can tell you so that you can avoid that personal pain for yourself. I could tell you that it is so worth it so save even your kisses for your husband only. You could ask me about it.

So, dear one, my nutshell version of wisdom to pass on to you is: between the Word of God and life experiences (yours or others) you will have all that you need to become a wise woman yourself. I am praying that as you enter this new age and stage of your life, you will continually seek the Lord in ALL you do. May your only desire be to honor and glorify your Maker!

I am so glad that you were born ☺

My Hate List

Hate is a very strong word. So strong that I just don't even allow my children to use it yet. But, as I've been holding in comments about things I hate, I have come to realize there are a few things that I H-A-T-E!
I HATE:
being too hot or too cold
the sound of a tea kettle whistling
obnoxious Oklahoma wind
Lies
cleaning up throw up
whining

But as to not leave this particular, hateful post in a negative tone. I absolutely LOVE my husband and the role he plays in my life. He is such a great supporter of me when I'm too hot or too cold. He's quick to take the kettle off the burner. He is honest with me. He actually helps cleaning up throw-up. And he deals with the whining as much as I do. I am not alone in this and I am blessed to have this companion. I feel guilt sometime for having someone who loves me like he does. But, when I think long and hard about it; I have no control of that. The only thing I can control is my self and that is only with the help of the Holy Spirit!

Father~ Thank you for loving me unconditionally. With all my hates, you embrace me where I am and gently teach me how to not sin in any of it. Because of you, nothing grips me so utterly that I don't see your way out! I open my hands with all the hates and loves in my life. I'm Yours! <><

What do you hate? What do you do with your hate? Obviously these are questions I've been pondering and found some good in addressing them.

Whirlwind

So, the day after Thanksgiving, we had to make our first time ever 9-1-1 call. Our youngest couldn't really wake up and was lethargic. After a day in the ER including a CAT Scan, we found out that she is as healthy as can be. I'm thrilled to hear that nothing is wrong with her but left somewhat confused as to what caused those horrible symptoms that morning.... that have not since returned (thankfully.)
Then, the next day the middle child had a fever of 102. And the oldest threw up three times. I caught it that night leaving me worthless by Sunday. All the while, our tradition of putting up decorations the day after Thanksgiving was more of a burden and a poor attempt.
Now, Tuesday, my poor hubby has the bug. The Christmas tree is up. The stockings are hung. We still have the outdoor lights, but with the wind and brrrrr-ness outside, who knows when that will really happen.
This whirlwind that we have had since my return from Nashville has left little room for me to write about the things I have been assessing within my heart.
I am currently reading a book that I am ready to recommend even though I haven't finished it. "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan is an eye-opener for the sleeping, lukewarm church and individual.
So good so far!!!!